Netflix The Witcher is Mediocre
First Off, I’m a Yuge Fan of the Games
My favorite video game of all time is The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt, followed closely by Skyrim then by Halo Reach. It took me a whole year to finish The Witcher 3 and when I finally completed the last DLC campaign, I was left with an incredible feeling of satisfaction.
Yet I was also filled with a twinge of sadness. I had not only completed the game to its near entirety, but I had also finished my first year of college. A chapter of my life closed along with the conclusion to one of my favorite hobbies ever.
What really resonated with me was the immersion of The Witcher 3. Like reading a great book I couldn’t wait until the end of the day to play the game. The sense of escapism was what drew me back time and time again.
Netflix The Witcher is Low Key Not Great
So, I come to you now, at the turn of the tide, to tell you that Netflix The Witcher isn’t that great. Now, before I am eaten alive by the ‘true’ fans who only watch the show to imagine themselves as one of the women who gets to sleep with Henry Cavill, hear me out. The show’s greatest shortcoming is that the overarching story is not immersive but confusing, and boring.
Of course, one would be correct in saying that a TV show can’t always be as immersive as a video game or a book. However, Netflix The Witcher is not immersive because it’s simply just a TV show, it’s not immersive because it’s written with such mediocrity.
My opinion is not one that many share with me, as an easy YouTube search will reveal that thousands of people have nothing but praise for the show. All the same, the show certainly could have been many times better.
My Epic Solution
A more effective way to have gone about adapting The Witcher would have been to have a ‘monster of the week’ style of storytelling. Rather than having an overarching main quest narrative, each episode should have been its own contained story, following Geralt as he hunts monsters, uncovers mysteries and battles brigands on the Path.
Now if you have read my Mandalorian blog you would be apt in calling me a hypocrite. My main criticism for the Mandalorian was that there was no main quest narrative and not a lot of connective tissue between each episode. However, the ‘monster of the week’ style I believe would work quite well for a Witcher adaption. This is because the side quest/single narrative episode method was already tested in the games and it succeeded to tremendous effect.
Testing My Hypothesis
Each quest of the game is basically a single, standalone episode with a unique setting, a plot, a cast of characters, a twist, and a critical choice for the protagonist. All of the ingredients are present for a one-hour TV episode. The writers could even directly copy storylines form the games and books as there is such a wealth of lore already in the Witcher universe.
Still unconvinced of my theory? Look no further, as the third episode of Netflix The Witcher tests my hypothesis. The parts of the episode with Geralt are fantastic as they follow the vagabond, monster hunter archetype impeccably.
The White Wolf rolls into town, discovers that there is unrest and a monster lurking about, he investigates with his enhanced abilities, exposes a dark side to the cursed princess, and in the end, he battles and cures the striga. This episode was by far the best of the eight and there is no question, in my mind, as to why that is. It followed a tried and true formula.
Conclusion
In the end, my opinion is just my opinion. Perhaps the new crop of Witcher fans only want to see a naked Henry Cavill and who am I to deny them that right? But in all seriousness, the show is a bummer because Henry is a stud and the writers squandered his passion and enthusiasm.
